There are some things in life where you just look at it and know beyond a shadow of a doubt. That is what Bull is. Just simply bad. Bull is almost an affront to my very existence. Instead of writing an actual, written-out review, I’m going to do a bullet point list and then never, ever talk about this show again and if I’m really lucky it’ll be cancelled by May. (It’s on CBS and it won’t).
- Bull stars Michael Weatherly of NCIS fame. He plays Jason Bull, an early version of Dr. Phil.
- He’s a master of human behavior. Except not really. He has a fancy computer with algorithms that judges potential jury’s nuances. It also catalogues people’s online footprint. This gross and nonsense.
- Bull checks out every woman he passes. Bull is a creep.
- Bull’s client is a secretly gay kid. This presents an undertone that all gay men have daddy issues and replace daddy with being gay. This is also gross. And offensive. But mainly gross.
- Bull takes advantage of a jury member having a gay son in jail. Do I even need to say it?
- The character of Bull is essentially a straight, male, anti-hero in a time where that archetype has already been played to death on televison. Like most things, CBS latches onto something well past the point when it would be intriguing.
- Anal sex gets a gasp from the courtroom. Regular sex is fine but anal is apparently one step too far. Sure, CBS, okay.
- It almost has an interesting ending, but it goes on two minutes too long. Because Bull has to be the hero in the end. Again, CBS through and through.
- How do you exist, Bull?
I could go on but, seriously, what’s the point? Either you like this trash or you don’t. I’ve said and I’m going to carry on pretending like this show doesn’t exist and be happy doing so.